Family Reconciliation
Introduction
Thinking about reconciliation
What a wonderful expreinced after knowing a period of estrangement
The saddest experience is to see separation of families
Sometimes people will not let go – bitterness and resentment comes in
It is equally sad if this happens in the Church family
Considering the reconciliation of Esau and Jacob
Example of the reconciliation Joseph and his brothers
v4 – Esau embraces Jacob
This reminds us of the image of the prodigal son from the New Testament
Our greatest need
Our greatest need is reconciliation … with God
Jacob had met with the living God
God had given him various promises and Jacob vowed allegiance to God
God was working in Jacob’s life – he was not a finished product
Jacob matured over 20 years
His relationship with God grew
He grew in intergrity
God met with Jacob again (on his way back to Esau and his family)
A Man wrested with Jacob at Peniel
He had seen God face-to-face
God changed his name to Israel
Before Jacob could be reconciled to his brother – he had to be reconciled with God
We need to get reconciled to God first, before we can be reconciled to a brother
We need an encounter with God
We need to come to Jesus Christ, who will forgive our sin, if we truly repent
We must be reconciled with God before we can be reconiled with man
Are you at peace with God?
Have you confessed sin?
Have you yielded your life to Christ?
Unnecessary Fears
Jacob had many unnecessary fears
Not unfounded – but unnecessary
God had gone before him
Jacob’s actions (v2):
The maidservants and children
The least favoured wife and children
Then he and Rachel
But then he goes ahead of them and bows down 7 times before his brother (v3)
Esau runs to him (v4)
This plan was not needed
His fears were unnecessary
God had gone before
Do we have unnecessary fears?
Do we trust God?
Example of Jericho
When we honour God – He will honour us (1 Sam 2:30)
Put God first
A humble, grace-filled attitude
Reconciliation requires a humble, grace-filled attitude
You cannot go with the attitude that you are right, that there are things the other needs to sort out
You need to come with humility and grace
Jacob’s attitutde:
He bows down seven times (v3)
Gen 27:29
What humility
The others also bow down (v6-7)
He calls Esau master
The language of grace is spoken by Jacob (v5)
Are we conscious of God’s grace (and many blessings) towards us?
He has known grace from God
Have we known God’s grace?
If so, we must be reconciled with others with the same grace that God has shown us
Warmth and sincerity
There must be warmth and sincerity
We must forgive from the heart – Matt 18:35
Not ‘agreeing to dis-agreeing’ and then never speaking to them again
Sometimes it is not possible
Where possible – there must be warmth
An embrace (v4)
True reconciliation:
Forgiven and forgotten
A clearing of debts
Motivated by love
A need for restitution?
Sometimes there is a need for restitution – words are not enough
Example of theft
Jacob offers a gift to Esau – v11
Jacob stole the blessing from Esau
He offers the blessing (not the Covenant blessing / that which God has provided) to Esau
Sometimes the past cannot be repaired
However, do we go back to correct our mistakes?
Jacob is doing something to put things right
Do we need to put things right?
What next?
Does reconciliation always mean long-term fellowship?
The passage might surprise us
Jacob does not return with Esau to Seir
He seems to make an excuse (v13)
He makes a lie (v14)
Something of the old Jacob is still there
This can be true of believers
Jacob is commanded to the promised land
He was putting God before family but went about it the wrong way
Do we put others before God?
To continue with Esau would bring corruption
Esau seemed outwardly changed (v4)
Yet the Bible speaks of him as a profane man
He does not acknowledge God once in this passage
He has done well but he is not a godly man
The New Testament tells us he found no room for repentance
People can seem outwardly good – yet they reject the living God
As Christians, we are in the world but not of the world
Light cannot have fellowship with darkness
The children of God cannot have fellowship with the children of the world
We are not to be unequally joked
We are to be careful in our relationships
Reconciliation does not necessarily mean friendship
Closing Remarks
Reading Eph 4:30-32
"And do not grieve the Holy Spirit of God, by whom you were sealed for the day of redemption. Let all bitterness, wrath, anger, clamor, and evil speaking be put away from you, with all malice. And be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, even as God in Christ forgave you."
Col 3:12-14
"Therefore, as the elect of God, holy and beloved, put on tender mercies, kindness, humility, meekness, longsuffering; bearing with one another, and forgiving one another, if anyone has a complaint against another; even as Christ forgave you, so you also must do. But above all these things put on love, which is the bond of perfection."